Monday, October 16, 2006

IM from God...


There are so many Siddurim these days translated into English...from translated to transliterated to having the English alongside the Hebrew..under the Hebrew..on top...facing page...blah blah..
I decided to introduce the first truly up to date translation of the Shemonah Esrei experience IM style...

God: Hey its me U know.. God
:-)
Me: hey
u know ur my fav..
God: am I?
Me: ur kidding right? cmon we go back a loooong way...member the old days? Avraham..Yitzchok.Yaakov?
no one can break what we got...
how do u do that stuff?..heal the sick..raise the dead..u know
ur really awesome
i luv u
btw sorry bout that..the other day..u know...whatever
God: are u?
Me: uh huh
hey I meant to ask u..can u heal me?..my heads killin
o hey and also ..got a few dollas to spare? :-)
ur the best...

when can we get together..?
this sux being here...so far
:-(
God: I know..for me too








God: u there?
Me: oh sorry..got distracted
God: s’ok
Me: u heard everything I said..before?
c’mon pleeeez come thru for me..just this time...i’ll be good
God: lol
Me: whats so funny..?
God: I’ve heard that b4
Me: I know I don’t say it enuff but I really appreciate everything u do for me..
Aight?
Peace?
K...ttyl?
God: see u in a few hours...be good
Me: of course....
:-)

Labels:

30 Comments:

Blogger anonym00kie said...

cuteeeeee
thats so adorable!!
i cant wait to get mail from G-d :)

October 16, 2006 8:59 PM  
Blogger torontopearl said...

David, that's a (key)stroke of genius. I think you can redo the famous YA "Are You There God? It's Me Margaret" book title.

October 16, 2006 9:27 PM  
Blogger Mata Hari said...

very creative
can you imagine - carrying on several convos while on im with the Almighty?

October 16, 2006 10:13 PM  
Blogger tuesdaywishes said...

I once dreamed I got an email from G-d...

October 16, 2006 11:05 PM  
Blogger Sara with NO H said...

O M G

God lols???

Who'da thunk it..

October 16, 2006 11:18 PM  
Blogger ~ Sarah ~ said...

hahaha!!
well, if that's what it's come to these days :P even G-d has to keep up with the technology

October 16, 2006 11:22 PM  
Blogger Shoshana said...

Very cute, and probably way too accurate. I want an IM from G-d.

October 17, 2006 8:59 AM  
Blogger kishmech said...

haha


btw SArah with no H..of course G-d lols, he has the most amazing sense of humour!!!

October 17, 2006 10:47 AM  
Blogger Pragmatician said...

What a conversation, I would try to keep Him online longer and ask a lot of questions!

October 17, 2006 11:01 AM  
Blogger socialworker/frustrated mom said...

That is so great, really imaginative. You never cease to amaze us.

October 17, 2006 2:45 PM  
Blogger Karl said...

This has to be a Classic post in the making!

October 17, 2006 3:25 PM  
Blogger kasamba said...

That was gR8!!!!!

October 17, 2006 5:19 PM  
Blogger lakewoodchick said...

That was a great post thanks for welocming me

October 17, 2006 8:51 PM  
Blogger David_on_the_Lake said...

anoym00kie...
youve gotten plenty

Pearl..
thanks..never read that

mata...
unfortunately...yes

tuesday...
and....what did it say?..lol

sara...
learn something new everyday..lol

sarah with an h....
of course...soon ..we'll all be texting all day...eventually our vocal chords will dissapear..lol

shosh...
thanks...I'll pass it on..next time we chat

kish..
thats true..

prag...
lol...well..we can ask..he doesnt always answer though

swfm...
Thanks..ur way too kind

karl...
thanks...
:-)

kas...
tks

lakewood...
thanks and sure thing...

October 18, 2006 11:50 AM  
Blogger Lakewood Venter said...

Very craetive! Very funny! very on target! Good Job DOTL!

p.s. Next time you speak to God tell him I say hi

October 18, 2006 12:27 PM  
Blogger MarriageIsNotDeath said...

very original, but I'm wondering,
was the hesitation when "Me" loses focus and is chatting with others at the same time? LOL

October 18, 2006 3:00 PM  
Blogger browneyedgirl said...

hi david- i havent checked any of the blogs in a LONG time, but im glad i checked yours today. I really like this post! Got me really thinking. SO- thanks.

October 18, 2006 6:03 PM  
Blogger ayala said...

This was awesome! Another fabulous post as usual.
I haven't been around for a while(crazy school schedule) so I hope you are doing well. I'm really going to try to catch up on the posts I missed. Really:)

October 18, 2006 7:44 PM  
Blogger tuesdaywishes said...

Of course G-d laughs! If you could see all of us and everything we do all the time, you'd laugh too!

(Well, maybe not when He looks at North Korea)

October 18, 2006 10:24 PM  
Blogger jemima3 said...

I love that. A machzor like that would have kept me spellbound over the Yomim Noraim. If you start now...maybe in time for next year?

October 19, 2006 7:59 AM  
Blogger chaverah said...

what a superb conversation. how real! OY! its almost embarrasing. how could we think god will give us everything we want when we barly acknowlegde his existence. sometimes you come up with the perfect post. thanks for the insight.

October 19, 2006 8:21 AM  
Blogger bellanny said...

with technology these days most people, including me, are devloping even shorter attention spans. thanks for the wake up call to keep working on my kavanah. makes me realize how silly we sound sometimes and how much we take for granted.

October 19, 2006 9:53 AM  
Blogger Bonnie B said...

Wow that certainly said a lot about how we talk to God-- asking, taking, thanking and fleeing-- only to come back again. Sometimes i think people are like beggars with a little worship thrown in for good measure.

October 19, 2006 10:23 AM  
Blogger David_on_the_Lake said...

LV...
Thanks...btw whats DOTL?
ps...he didnt recognize the name..do u go by another name?

mind...
Thanks...sometimes...

browneyed...
oh my...Havent seen u in ages..Howve u been?
Thanks...

ayala...
wow...everyones coming out of the woodwork...
Thanks...
Speaking of fabulous posts as usual..when are u posting next?

tuesday..
ur soo right

jemima...
working on it...I'll send u an autographed copy..when its out

Chavera...
i know sometimes i feel the same way...
Thanks

bellany...
exactly....so easily distractable...it aint easy

bonnie...
unfortunately...we are beggars..but we do need him for everything..we just should appreciate it more

October 19, 2006 2:44 PM  
Blogger chaverah said...

David - DOTL = David on the Lake

October 19, 2006 10:49 PM  
Blogger Lost said...

I love this. me and the Him haven't had the TALK in a while. Long overdue.

October 20, 2006 12:00 AM  
Blogger David_on_the_Lake said...

chaverah...
lol..Here I am..looking up IM lingo for DOTL...thanks

lost...
need his sn?
lol

October 20, 2006 9:48 AM  
Blogger It's All Good Now said...

This reminds me of the sign I saw in front of a church, "God reads knee mail"
David,I like the way you are not afraid to explore the human side of God. It shows how comfortable you are with Him in your life, and that you believe that He accepts you as you are.

October 26, 2006 10:22 PM  
Blogger David_on_the_Lake said...

itsallgood...
thank u..
I believe he acceots us all how we are in the hope that we'll improve..

October 27, 2006 9:09 AM  
Blogger Ruchi Koval said...

this is amazing. 5 years old... posting on fb today. SO glad I discovered this.

September 16, 2011 12:03 AM  

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