Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Exclusive Interview #2

I’m proud to bring you another profie of a wondrous organization in our community.
The Organization, called Never Too Early or NTE Intervention was founded in 2006 by Rabbi Zev Schenectedy. Rabbi Schenectedy was a pre-1-a Rebbe for many years before starting this endeavor and his dealings with small children is well known. We are proud to have Rabbi S with us to answer some questions about NTE.

DOL: Sholom Rabbi S, it is truly an honor to have you here.

Rabbi S: Thank you..I’m a big fan of the blog..

DOL: So tell us what it is that you saw in our community that compelled you to start NTE.

Rabbi S: It was Chol Hamoed Sukkos 2005. I was sent to a house in Flatbush to pick up a package. While waiting in the hallway for the woman of the house to retrive the item I was saddened to see 3 of her precious grandchildren aged 4 to 7 on the couch in the den watching this show..I’d rather not say exactly..but you can imagine..it had a big purple dinosaur..rachmono litzlan.
The woman was busy on the phone and obviously felt that parking her grandchildren from Lakewood there would give her peace and quiet. I realized that there must be hundreds of other zeese nashamos out there at Bubbies and Zaidies in Brooklyn, Monsey, Queens that are exposing their neshamos to this.
So I opened a safe house called Toddler Zone intervention where there are big screens playing only Uncle Moishy and theres plenty of nosh.

We have a staff of 20 motivated askanim that work on tips and clues to figure out which kids will be spending time at Grandparents homes and they put themselves at great risks sometimes to save their souls.

DOL: Wow, how do they get the kids to go with them?

Rabbi S: Usually some really good looking nosh does the trick. We sneak up to windows and lure them out. Sometimes we encounter some resistance, especially when there’s something good on, but our staff is trained to handle toddlers.

DOL: I bet. How do the grandparents react?

Rabbi S: They usually don’t even realize that the kids are gone..as we leave the TV on and make sure to bring them back for dinner.

DOL: How do you raise funds?

Rabbi S: Actually, in the few cases when the Bubby realized their grandkids missing, we leave a note with an anonymous phone number. The red faced grandparents would rather pay a small ransom to get their grandkids back, rather then answer to furious parents. So we’ve done quite well for ourselves.

Boruch Hashem we’ve seen much Hatzlocha and have saved countless precious Yiddishe Neshomas from the impurities of television and give them a place to mope and cry. But when they grow up they will thank us.

Thank You for this interview.

DOL: Thank You for stopping by.


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3 Comments:

Anonymous Anony said...

It might be cheaper (and easier) to just distribute the Uncle Moishy videos. Some grandparents might even PAY for it.

December 23, 2008 1:51 PM  
Anonymous eve said...

Hysterically satirical!

But...Schenectady? That's the best you could do?

December 23, 2008 3:15 PM  
Blogger The Dreamer said...

lol

January 09, 2009 10:15 AM  

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